YAAAAAAAR , IT BETALK LIKE A PIRATE DAY , YE OLDE , FESTERING WENCH ! AS SUCH , I WILL SHOUT ALL ME ranting AND YOU’LL LIKE IT . IF THOU EVER HOPES TO GET SOME SEA leg , YOU’D BEST HEED THIS LIST .

Sailboats just wo n’t do for a pirate anymore . Hell , normal - powered gravy holder wo n’t even do . When your punic elbow room have the combine naval power of various nations tailing you , you postulate to take the Salmon P. Chase underwater . This hybrid speedboat / submarine can cruise the water at 40 nautical mile , or take a magnetic dip at profundity make 250 feet . $ 3.5 Million

brand are soooooooo seventeenth 100 . And do n’t get me started about pistols . If you ’re run to engage in combat , at least recognise the fact that you subsist in the class 2011 and fight with electricity . The stun billystick deport a million volts of energy to the physical structure of anyone unlucky enough to encounter it . Oh , and it has an lead torch . $ 105

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Once upon a time , medieval warrior played cheat to keep the strategic and tactical concepts of conflict overbold in their minds . A Pirate should have the same affair . Sid Meier ’s updated chef-d’oeuvre , now available on the iPad , will have you plunder , dueling and yarrrrrrring in no time flat . $ 5

Pirates do n’t just sail the mellow sea . They also transmit across high frequencies . Even if you ca n’t exert a sword IRL , you could equip yourself with a radio sender , which will attend as a metaphorical edge in the fight against Clear Channel . $ 270

buccaneering also remove place in the ground of 1s and 0s . If you ’re going to find a digital cave full of treasure , you need to screw how to pilot the information thruway . This map of the cyberspace shows you the swap routes for data all across the globe . Study it wisely . Free

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https://vimeo.com/15228767

This is Bittorrent . On the internet , it is your watercraft . It is to be used for pirating “ FREELY DISTRIBUTED ” CONTENT ONLY . Free

You ’re a Pirate . If you design on exist long enough to become a legend , you will belike lose a branch . favourable for you , peg pegleg are a matter of the past . Now you will glide around on a carbon paper fiber blade prosthesis , which enables amputees to run for at world - class speeds . $ 20,000 / pegleg

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You ’ll never amount to a deuced thing as a pirate if you ca n’t handle your rum . weak pirates from simpler times used to water down their rummy , call it grog . Be better than that . Do n’t just fuddle gross firewater . deglutition superadulterated firewater in the bod of Bacardi 151 and you ’ll be talking like a sea rover whether you require to or not . $ 25

Top Image via Shutterstock / Maximus256

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